Mewtwo's Quest
by Highliez
Summary: Upon returning to the Smash Mansion, Mewtwo has a mission: to help other cut characters return to the game as DLC. Helping him is his fellow Smasher Doctor Mario, as well as other random people. What could possibly go wrong? CRACKFIC. Rated T Just Cause. (See what I did there?)


"GUESS WHO'S BACK, SCRUBS!" Mewtwo screamed in glory.

Sheik barely batted an eye. "So what? Doctor Mario came back, you coming back as well isn't that big of a deal."

Mewtwo stopped screaming and stared at Sheik.

She noticed and looked over at the psychic Pokemon. "What?"

And that's how Sheik ended up in the hospital for five months.

* * *

><p>"Alright." Mewtwo focused his attention on the list of Smashers that weren't participating in the tournaments anymore. The list included:<p>

**OoT Link**

**OoT Zelda/Sheik**

**OoT Ganondorf**

**Young Link**

**Ice Climbers**

**Roy **(Someone had wrote Koopa after his name, out of pure anger)

**Pichu**

**Lucas**

**Pokemon Trainer/Red**

**Wolf**

**Snake**

Mewtwo took in a deep breath. "I...I CAN DO THIS!" he screamed. "I WILL FIGHT FOR ROY TO BE BACK IN THIS TOURNAMENT!"

Captain Falcon, hearing the scream (because who _wouldn't?_) walked up to Mewtwo, and punched him. Nevermind. He actually Falcon Punched him.

"Are you Falcon Insane?! Roy is the most Falcon Hated Fire Emblem Falcon Character of all Falcon Time, and is Falcon Irrelevant!"

"Oh, so that's why you're still here, right?"

Mewtwo then proceeded to float away like a sir. He was also wearing a random top hat, a monacle, a tie, and a fancy suit.

"I shall go to Roy!" he shouted. "And then I shall get him in the tournament as DLC! I'll do that with everyone, and soon, all us 'cut characters' will have our revenge!" He laughed evilly. "And I know just the person to help me accomplish this!"

* * *

><p>"...and that's why I need your help." he finished.<p>

Doctor Mario looked at him, concerned. "Are you _sure_ you don't want me to test you for insanity?"

"It's alright, doc. But will you help me?"

Normally, the good doctor would have tested him for insanity as he had mentioned, and then told Master Hand. But Mewtwo...he was insane in the doctor's mind, which would mean he would kill the doctor if he said no.

"I'LL DO IT PLEASE DON'T KILL ME PLEASE I SWEAR-"

"Thanks doc. Let's go over to Roy's."

* * *

><p>Entering the portal to Pherae, Mewtwo and Doctor Mario looked around at the green plains.<p>

"Hmm...shouldn't he be here somewhere?" Doctor Mario asked.

"Yeah, I guess he sh-"

Suddenly, the two were unable to move as their vision flashed black for a second, and then they saw a giant bush in front of them.

_A Giant Bush Appeared!_

_Bush used Nothing!_

Mewtwo screamed.

"SHUT UP!" Doctor Mario yelled.

"B..bu...BUT IT'S A MONSTEEEEEEER!" Mewtwo started to run around in circles for no apparent reason and tripped over his own tail, falling and sending himself unconscious.

_It's Super Effective! Mewtwo fainted._

The bush proceeded to do nothing as usual, until the good doctor suddenly had a random heart attack.

_Bush used nothing!_

Doctor Mario slowly fell down to the ground as he tried to stay awake. "Damn...you..." He was about to faint when someone towered over them. This person had a blue cape, a sword, pants, shoes, an-

"WE GET IT!" Mewtwo screamed, suddenly awake. "IT'S ROY COMING TO SAVE US!"

Marth looked back at him with a look of disgust. "FILTHY ANIMAL!" he kicked Mewtwo's head multiple times before the Pokemon grabbed hold of the prince's leg. Marth screamed. "CATS ARE NOT PERMITTED TO TOUCH THE ROYAL CLOTHES!" Marth then proceeded to pick up the Pokemon and throw him into a nearby river, where he went limp and became submerged in the water.

_Doctor Mario almost fainted and Marth joined the battle and Mewtwo fainted...wait what?_

Marth immediately confronted the Battle Narrator. "You don't even know what's happening?!"

_Not really..._

"YOU DON'T **DESERVE** TO BE A NARRATOR!"

The Battle Narrator gasped and started crying.

"Now then..." Doctor Mario got off the ground, perfectly fine. "Should we go to Roy? And thanks for getting rid of Mewtwo, Princess Martha. He's insane."

"No proble-" Marth stopped speaking.

"Yes?"

"Did...did you just call me...PRINCESS MARTHA?!"

"Uh...yes?"

Marth picked up the pesky doctor and threw him off a cliff.

* * *

><p>Doctor Mario woke up in a room. Looking up, he saw he had fell through the roof. He looked around and saw Roy in a bed, sleeping.<p>

"OH MY GOD YES!" he screamed, and threw himself onto Roy's body.

"WHAT THE-" Eliwood woke up to see a very short, fat, yet very awesome man jumping on him. He narrowed his eyes.

And just then, Roy came into the room.

"Father, what is it?" Upon seeing the doctor, he gasped and threw him out a window.

"I DON'T NEED A CHECKUP!" He screamed. "MY TEETH ARE FINE!" to prove his point, he opened his mouth to show almost no teeth left in his mouth. A servant then walked in. "Master Roy, you have a visitor."

"Who is it?" he asked, uninterested. Marth walked into the room. He gasped upon seeing the blue-haired prince.

"Roy, you need to come to Smash Bros. again." Marth begged. "The crowd misses saying 'Roy's our boy!'"

"So?" Roy inquired. "I'm too good for that place."

"They have another Roy now."

"ERMAGHERD!" Roy jumped through the window, onto Mewtwo, who had been flying out of the river. Doctor Mario and Marth also jumped onto the Pokemon, causing him to become almost immobile.

"ONWARD!" Marth screamed.

"WAIT!" Eliwood yelled through the window. "ROY, YOU FORGOT YOUR SNICKERDOODLES!"

* * *

><p><em>Many hours later, in a galaxy far, far away...<em>

Roy ran through the doors to the Smash Mansion. "I CHALLENGE YOU!" he screamed. "I CHALLENGE IKE AND ROY TO A MELEE!"

"What's a Melee?" Ike said running up to our redheaded swordsman, as well as Roy Koopa.

Roy just stared.

"YOU IDIOT!" he slapped Ike across the face, mortally wounding him. Doctor Mario ran up to him and checked his pulse. "He's-a dead."

"Woohoo!" Roy Koopa celebrated. "Looks like he won't be returning next time."

"I challenge you, name stealer, to a Melee!" Swordsman Roy pointed his blade at Roy Koopa.

"Challenge accepted, scrub."

"I'm not a scrub."

"Of course you are. I could beat you any day in Call of Duty."

"I'm literally older and taller than you, so if anything you're the scrub."

"What is this commotion?" Master Hand walked up to them. He gasped upon seeing Swordsman Roy. "OUT!" he pointed toward the door.

"But why?" Swordsman Roy asked. "I'm everyone's boy!"

"You're also everyone's toy."

"But if I'm everyone's toy, then he is too." Roy pointed toward Roy. "And since I already have the title of being everyone's boy, I can't switch titles. SO HE IS EVERYONE'S TOY, AND I AM EVERYONE'S BOY!"

Master Hand gasped and fainted.

"You'll pay, kid!" Roy Koopa ran at Swordsman Roy in his Clown Cart.

Roy simply took him out of it and threw him across the room. He then proceeded to jump into the Clown Cart himself and flew away, laughing evilly.

"So evil..." Mewtwo muttered. "I CAN'T TAKE IT!"

"You ARE evil!" Doctor Mario said with a raised eyebrow. "If such an evil evilness like yourself can't handle other evil evilness, then you need to either be operated on by me or you aren't truly evil."

"There's so much evilness in that sentence." Marth said.

"So true." Mewtwo stated, not scared anymore. "Hey! I'm cured!" He then danced around the room like an idiot.

Little did they know that Roy was flying in the Clown Cart up above, recording the entire ordeal. He laughed evilly once more. "This is **SO** going on Youtube!"

* * *

><p><strong>TO BE CONTINUED IN 20XX...<strong>

**...**

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**...**

**JK**


End file.
